Dear Everyone

Since I'm having a fun time with college stress currently, I thought I'd share some of my foolproof ideas for paying tuition with you. Feel free to use my ideas. Really, I'm here to help.

1) Get a job and work a million hours and get paid.
2) Join the National Guard and let them pay for college.
3) Marry a millionaire/be a sugar baby.
4) Sell your younger siblings.
5) Write inspirational quotes and sell them to a fortune cookie company.
6) Throw paint on a canvas at random and call it modern art.
7) Rob a bank.
8) Take your friend with a scholarship and throw them in a dungeon and pose as them.
9) Get a really good SAT score.
10) Write childrens books.
11) Take apart your refrigerator and sell the parts.
12) Try to make a living as the next Little Match Girl.
13) Become a contract killer.
14) Dig up dinosaur fossils and sell them.
15) Be an extra in a thousand hollywood blockbusters.
16) Cut your limbs off and sell them on the black market.
17) Work hard and do work studies at school.
18) Donate plasma.
19) Make parody videos to hotline bling.
20) Become a stripper.

You're so welcome.

Signed,
Emma